Jason Bourne, I mean Matt Damon is Jason Bourne in a movie about Jason Bourne in the most original title for a film this decade: JASON BOURNE. All caps means it’s special.

And special it is – a great cast including Tommy Lee Jones, Alicia Vikander, and Vincent Cassell can’t save this movie from at-best mediocrity at times and sheer stupidity in the rest of the film. There’s absolutely nothing in the movie that hasn’t been done four times before and the shaky cam is still annoying as fuck. Not only is it used for things when it shouldn’t (like looking at a phone screen), it’s used in place of real editing in this film too and the laziness shows. There’s a very half-hearted attempt at weaving privacy concerns into the storyline, but it’s just there to setup the final action sequences.

Matt Damon is JASON BOURNE. But you already know his name.

During one of these sequences, the guy hired to fail to kill Bourne, named the “Asset” of course, plows through about two dozen cars in a SWAT van in a traffic jam blowing them to the sides in dramatic fashion as bumpers, front ends and crumpled cars go flying, but the van doesn’t receive a scratch. Bourne follows in an unmarked black Dodge Charger – the movie makes sure I know this because the movie was sure to tell me this via police radio as he gets in the shiny black Charger for his commercial, I mean action sequence featuring the Charger.

The script is lazy, the direction is lazy, the characters are poor and Matt Damon phones it in. Easily the worst of the Bourne films.

SPOILER – the character played by Julia Stiles, a fan favorite in the first three films, gets killed rather early in the movie, her body simply left unceremoniously in a Greek alley somewhere. Will she miraculously come back in a future film titled The Bourne Lobotomy? Who cares?

Grade: D

I found Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 to be very good and better than the original, unlike most others. There was a lot more plot and it was all about family. The action was great, the humor was funny, and there were a couple of unexpected cameos. The CGI of a young Kurt Russel in the beginning overtop of another actor worked well too.

My chief complaint with the film was that it seemed like I was watching an extended cut. I felt strongly that about 20 minutes could have been cut and coincidentally, that would have shortened the running time to just under two hours rather than 2 hours and 16 minutes. This prevents it from getting a full A.

Grade A-

Suicide Squad came on HBONow last Saturday and I figured I needed to watch it, especially since I had just seen Batman V. Superman. I guess I should review it too. Unfortunately, I found Suicide Squad to be inferior to Batman V. Superman, even though everyone was in love with the Suicide Squad trailer, as compared to their hatred for the Batman V. Superman trailer.

The positives of the film are Will Smith’s performance as Deadshot and Margot Robbie’s performance as Harley Quinn. Interestingly, this is the first time I’ve seen Cara Delevinge on the screen, who plays an archaeologist who gets possessed by a witch named the Enchantress. Delevigne is in an upcoming film of interest, Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets and I have seen the trailer for that. She was hardly in the movie as the archaeologist and that performance was fine. The Enchantress performance seemed mediocre at best, but I think the primary problem was the dubbing of audio over top of her lip syncing, or something. Something wasn’t right about it at all and it took away from her performance and the scenes with the Enchantress.

The visual effects weren’t bad, but in spots weren’t necessarily good either. As for the true negatives – the story, the direction, the Joker hardly being in it. Perhaps the biggest problem with this movie is the attempt at making unlikable people likable, some of whom do unlikable things throughout the entire movie. While it generally works for Deadshot and Quinn, it fails miserably on everyone else. The other characters are completely useless too; Jai Courtney sucks as usual as an Australian named Boomerang, a guy who uses a…you guessed it…boomerang to kill people. There’s also a crocodile guy or something, a Japanese woman who uses a…you guessed it…sword to kill people and then there’s the guy that can turn his body into a flamethrower, Diablo, but then sits around most of the movie brooding while refusing to use his powers. Lame. But even lamer, there’s one guy who can climb buildings real fast and then gets killed immediately. Not even in battle. LAME.

Grade: D

Spoilers?

I rented and streamed The Devil’s Candy this past weekend based on a review by Chris Stuckmann and the fact that most reviewers are giving it positive reviews. Unfortunately, I found the film to be mediocre. The issue I had with it was that it basically seemed like a standard slasher flick. Yea, it’s an indie film and some may like the artsy take on it, but all I found that part to be was an homage to heavy metal music. And that’s pretty much all the film was – a crazy guy killing children to the backdrop of heavy metal music. Even the climactic ending seemed like it was simply an homage to heavy metal music videos and album covers.

That having been said, I liked the performances of all the actors involved especially the three family members (Kiara Glasco, the teenager, is definitely one to watch for a good film career in the future), but unfortunately, Pruitt Taylor Vince, the killer, plays his typecast character the same as most everywhere else he’s been. Which is to say very well, but I’ve seen the exact same actor playing the exact same character in movies a couple of times before (the first one being 2003’s Identity with John Cusack).

Also, Vudu had streaming problems Saturday evening when I wanted to watch the film and I ended up having to watch it Sunday evening. Lame.

Grade: C+

P.S. I found the creepiest scene to be the one where the killer appears in the girl’s bed.

Misunderstood Movies discusses movies that I assume one has seen. Thus, there are spoilers.

Reading reviews of The Forgotten, a 2004 film starring Julianne Moore, reveals that not many people like it – they found the premise and ending laughably bad. I found it to be a fresh take on an old science fiction trope, though, and while I didn’t think it was a great movie, I didn’t think it was all that bad either. The director, Joseph Ruben, had another interesting science fiction movie to his credit, Dreamscape, 20 years earlier.

The main character (I’m just going to straight up call her Julianne Moore), Moore, wakes up one morning to not have a nine year old son, even though she is sure she has one. The film sees her psychiatrist tell her she had a miscarriage and that she is suffering some form of psychosis as a result of the miscarriage years ago. Her husband, trying to be supportive, says basically the same.

Moore, intent on investigating, finds that not all is what it seems. She tracks down a man she remembers had a daughter and eventually he remembers his daughter. Together they go on the run while agents pursue them. Several scenes telegraph that it is aliens who are doing this to them. By the end of the film, it is revealed that it is indeed aliens doing it to them. The film ends.

Yep, that’s pretty much it. But the film is more a psychological thriller and it’s more the journey to the conclusion that makes it a fairly likable film to me. Reading reviews and people’s thoughts on the film reveal that nobody understood the fact that the film is portraying humans as laboratory rats even though everyone understood it was aliens who were the experimenters. The humans are literally laboratory rats, as seen in the scenes where they are suddenly pulled into the sky. It’s as if there’s an unseen tail on the human that suddenly gets yanked and the rat gets pulled away out of the experiment.

It’s even said by the psychiatrist (played by Gary Sinise) towards the end:

“They’ve been doing it for years. Maybe forever…We just try to minimize the damage…You’ve held on and they don’t know why. You’re just a lab rat to them.”

Also, when the alien presents itself, she’s in an airplane hangar. But look closer and it’s really just a rat in a maze and the alien experimenter is continuing to try to guide her. Seeing reviews and comments on the film, I don’t think many people got this. For example, Roger Ebert casually mentions it as if the hangar scene is simply a cliché:

I could easily be wrong, though, with most people having gotten the rat thing and laughing at the premise anyway. I also enjoyed the hangar scene because the actor portrayed the alien rather creepily throughout the film and I liked his “You…need…to…FORGET!” and his wipe of her memory of her child being born.

Also, the scene where the agents come out of nowhere and ram her car was very effective and is something that was copied immediately after the film came out and continues to be copied to this day. I specifically remember a set of Volkswagen commercials trying to copy this, but they weren’t nearly as effective.

It also doesn’t hurt that Moore is easy on the eyes. That’s all I’ve got for The Forgotten.